“What will you give birth to this year?” At the end of 2017, a friend asked me this question when I told her I was having surgery to remove my fallopian tubes, finalizing our decision to remain childfree. I may never give birth to a living child, but I can birth ideas, creative work, projects […]
For most of my life, I assumed that I would be a mother, raising a wild, creative crew of young feisty children, my house filled with noise and love. Since our earliest days together, Ben and I would talk about our future kids, joking about how they’d better have musical talent, arguing over how many […]
Some people completely embrace the holidays. They love the decorations, putting lights up on the house, picking out presents for anyone and everyone – from a close friend to the mailman. They listen to the Bing Crosby Holiday Pandora station at work, declining to wear headphones because they’d rather share that holiday cheer with everyone […]
The moment you realize you are losing someone you love, you can see the grief coming, approaching like an endless ocean that you know you are about to jump into and attempt to swim across. My first miscarriage came two weeks after finding out I was pregnant, and when I started to bleed, I watched […]
“Anybody who travels knows that you’re not really doing so in order to move around, you’re traveling in order to be moved.” – Pico Iyer On Saturday morning, October 15th, I hit the road for the last time. I was almost home. After the past few days’ events, I was feeling even more grateful […]
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?- Mary OliverBefore, I was an achiever. My #1 strength in strengthsfinder, I was always working towards something. When I reached my goal (which I always did, finding ways around the roadblocks, when I fell, picking myself up to try […]
The world sees the motherwho pushes, breathing through her pain, birthingwho tenderly caresses a smooth, small facewho nourishes her child at her breastwho tells the story to her son of how he came into her lifewho watches her daughter grow into a womanThe wiping of noses and buttsthe lack of sleepthe inability to quiet the screaming discontentkisses given to mend boo booshugs […]
Living with infertility is like walking through life with a dark cloud over your head, while everything beyond arms reach is bright and sunny. It can be incredibly isolating, even more so when you are vulnerable and share your truth with the people around you, people in the sun, and they express how sorry they are […]
We spend every day of our lives making choices, big and small. What to study in school, how to spend your paycheck, when to get out of bed (snuggle the pets for another few minutes or shower and get ready for work?), what city to live in, what to wear to the holiday party. We […]
